My Response to "Tips to Begin the School Year"

Kerry Dickinson reposted her "Tips to Begin the School Year" and asked for responses. Kerry, ask and you shall receive!

1. Don't over schedule your children.

FedUpMom: I think the recession will take care of this problem.

2. Don’t sign your child up for academic tutoring unless he/she is in jeopardy of failing a class.

FedUpMom: I think a lot of tutoring goes on because the parents feel the school's curriculum is weak, and they may be right. Also, what about a child who has a special interest that isn't covered at school?

3. Don’t ask your kids about grades, test scores or homework too often. Instead, focus on the content of the subject.

FedUpMom: I agree.

4. If you are connected to an electronic school communication tool (like "School Loop") don't look at homework assignments and grades daily.

FedUpMom: I agree.

5. Give your kids at least an hour of down time after school.

FedUpMom: I agree.

6. Have your child do daily or weekly chores.

FedUpMom: I agree, in theory if not always in practice.

7. Don’t yell at your kids during homework time; you are not the homework enforcer. If they spend more that 10 minutes a night per grade level, email or talk to the teacher. (ie., 10 minutes/night in 1st grade, 40 minutes/night in 4th grade, etc.).

FedUpMom: I agree that we shouldn't be homework enforcers, but I disagree with the 10 minutes a night per grade level rule. As Alfie Kohn rightly states, some homework isn't worth 5 minutes of our kids' time (the infamous reading log comes to mind.) When it comes to homework, we need to talk about quality as well as quantity.

8. Don’t go to every scheduled sports game or extracurricular activity of your child’s.

FedUpMom: The trick is to make your attendance supportive, not a source of pressure.

9. Encourage unstructured outside neighborhood activities after school - a walk, a bike ride, hide-n-seek, skateboarding, picking flowers, building something, drawing on the sidewalk with chalk, etc.

FedUpMom: I agree.

10. Don’t use rewards and punishments with regard to school and sports.

FedUpMom: I agree.

11. Let your children fail. Think of the slogan "Fail to Succeed." In other words, they must make failed attempts at tasks before they can succeed.

FedUpMom: I strongly disagree with this one. Failure can be a devastating experience for a sensitive child, especially the kind of failure that happens at school, where the child usually has no way to remedy the situation. At the very least, a child who fails a test should have an opportunity to review the material and take the test over. And the failure should never be public.